I look at clouds from both sides now...

First of all. Happy new year! Second of all. I am a bum. Every day I have new things to write and think about, but I've been too lazy to actually write them down. So sorry, this will be the compressed version of basically everything that's happened in the last month.

Ummm... where to start...

Christmas was awesome... B and Jesse came to see us so that was great, even if it did mean waiting till almost 10 to open presents... (waiting till 8 used to be hard enough for me... luckily, I am basically a master of oversleeping these days.) I got some pretty amazing gifts - I think the two most amazing were the juke cell phone from Mom and Dad (which I promptly named Rigby, because it is red and amazing and it seemed the thing to do), and the lovely addition of "The Little Prince" that Kate gave me. The thing that really got me about that was that she read through the whole thing and marked the lines that were special to her, and I actually cried... which is strange. I haven't cried for being happy in like... ever. That book just means a lot to me, I guess.

Anyway, the day after Christmas we left for the mountains. Long drive... awkward stories... none of which will be posted here. So yeah, deal with that.

It was a great week up there! So nice to relax... I mean a week ago today, Jon, Kate and I were out building a snowman named Cat who was as tall as Jon himself, and then we watched Marlon Brando movies (whom I have totally fallen in love with) until midnight... and wow, yeah, this was New Year's Eve.... day. It seems like years since then. Sometimes I got bored up there though, cause everyone else goes up there and they just READ the whole time. I like reading, but only for about two hours. Then I want to DO something. They could read all day though - which they did. So I spent a lot of time listening to music, writing, or talking to Laura on my phone.

Let's see. We got back late Friday night, Saturday I basically did nothing... Sunday was.. interesting... yeah, and Monday piano lessons started up again. I've been doing a bit of school this week, though not nearly as much as I should. I've got a lot of history and biology to do in the next week, since I won't be at Groups on the 16th. I'm going to the speech tournament a week from tomorrow, SCARY!!! I barely have my speech memorized.

See, when things stress me out, I tend to push them away and lock them up some place. It's really quite a skill, I've turned out to be a very good pusher and locker. It just doesn't do me any favors, is all.

Last night I stayed up till 2 finishing "Huckleberry Finn" and today I wrote some essays for it, since I've got class on Friday. Though, I did my homework so I feel alright about that now. A little tired, but alright.

Recently I've taken to going on long walks when there's nothing better to do. I don't go alone, cause I'm too paranoid about people, but usually Kate will go with me. Yesterday I had Amelia over for a few hours and we wandered around the harbor all through the afternoon/evening. That really cleared my head... I love walks, and I love being able to talk. Sometimes it's easier to talk to people who aren't related, y'know?

I've just been feeling kind of fuzzy-headed recently. I think it may be due to some sort of insomnia I'm dealing with. Since the last couple nights of vacation, I haven't been able to sleep real well. Say I go to bed at midnight - I don't end up falling asleep till nearly two. It's terrible! But then, once I DO fall asleep, I sleep till like ten... which is even more terrible. It's a vicious cycle. AND, there is no good coffee to be had around here recently. So that doesn't help my day-time life much. I think I just have some things to clear up in my head and then I'll be alright.

New Year's got me thinking. It also got me depressed - maybe that's why my head's in this thing. See, last year (2008) was just kind of lame for me. Everybody else had interesting or life-altering stuff happen. I mean it was an important year for so many people. But me? Nah. Nothing of interest really happened. I mean I can find ways to keep myself entertained, you know, but in the ways of things to tell the grandkids someday about? Not so much. Then I got to thinking, nothing of much excitement is in range for this year, either. The only thing I know for sure about 2009 is, I'll be the only kid at home in a few months. That kind of gives me a weird feeling in the back of my stomach.

Especially since Kate's thinking of transferring to Seattle. I'll go crazy. Not to sound emo or melodramatic or anything like that, but I will. In all honesty, I think I'll probably turn into one of those pathetic people who wanders around thinking about how alone they are. At least for a little while. Oh I'll grow out of it, but for a while I'll probably need to sit in it. I guess the one good thing that would come of it, is I'll learn to be more independent this year. Y'know, stand on my own two feet and that. Compared to sitting comfortably with a few good pals, though, that doesn't sound too exciting...

heh, see? Lots to write about. I should do this more often so it's not so huge all at once. My fingers hurt. Well, more some other time.